+ / –

Posted on December 28, 2005 by Roxa

Here goes 2005`s review.

<< + >>

– got my driver licence

– got my Cambridge diploma ( CAE )

– my first article got published in EgoPHobia e-zine

– changed school, which turned out to be a good thing after all.. :)

– discovered rock music and all that comes with it

– seen Apocalyptica and Paradise Lost performing live.

– been at Peninsula festival, which actually changed my life

– met new people.. been accepted in the rocker`s small ‘community’ :) – Cotoara, Bandean, Pavel..

– regained Adi and Csabi as friends

– owning a classic guitar and being able to play Metallica`s ONE with it ( ok ok, only the beginning )

– discovered the cure for soul in music

– my back didn`t cause any trouble this year

<< - >>

– lost first love

– still haven`t found the balance between love and friendship.

2005 photo album – session 2

Posted on December 27, 2005 by Roxa

The pooh dog.. Csabi`s gift. Told you it`s freakin` huge. :)

That`s the famous Morar Andrei, the author of so many pictures around here.. He`s only 1/2 rocker, not entirely converted, but it`s on our to-do list. :))) Oh, and in the last picture, you can see his nails and the reason they`re so famous for. :)))))))))))

Aahahhahahahahahaha, I declare this the picture of the year.. that`s Steel, with his nose and mouth stuck on to a window in Star FM studio.. :))))

Crazy Dorin.. crazy posture. :)))))))

Uhm.. that`s Adi.. :) First picture he is ‘a rocker’. Second.. he`s ‘sleeping’. :)))))))))

Ultraviolets in the floor. Bizzare Pub. :)

The cross near a Christmas tree. Antithesis ? ;)

Canon`s user manual

Posted on December 26, 2005 by Roxa

‘Troubleshooting : camera isn`t functioning.

Reason : camera isn`t on.

Solution : turn on the camera.’

No comment.

Xmas and beyond

Posted on December 25, 2005 by Roxa

So.. hmwhat ? What if Santa was so giving this year ? My folks got me a classic guitar, Adi a TV tunner and Csabi a big pooh dog.. and I mean big ! Like a meter or so. :) I would have never imagined that coming from them.. I mean, yes, we`re friends, but.. :) It means so much to me. :) Not the gifts as they are, but the fact they gave them from the heart. Thanks a lot, guys.

My Christmas tree looks awesome, the atmosphere is great, it`s snowing, but.. of course, Christmas.. started bad, with a terrible hangover from Rock Xmas event ( where I had the chance to listen to Godmode from Cluj – love `em – and Fading Circles again – adore `em !! ) and an unsual depression ( met duck after half an year at the event ). A few hours of agony, of silly questions about all the Christmas fuss ( like.. what is Christmas all about ? Why is it considered such a great holiday ? Why can`t I feel the spirit of Christmas ? What should I feel exactly ? I should be glad about what ? Singing carols about a God I don`t believe in ?, etc.. etc. ) and everything was ok afterwards, when I met with Adi, Csabi, Steel and Criss at Star FM.

Hmmm.. Christmas is nice because of other things. For example, I now have enough time to watch movies, listen some new music, write, talk to the guys on messenger, going out. It`s holiday, and on holiday everyone relaxes. :) Here are some pics I`ve noticed on my computer. :)

Silly SensiBlu reindeer I photographed after a Tubor Strong one Friday. Isn`t that cute ? :))

That`s Bandean Vlad Aiurel.. :)))) I wrote about him in the ‘From normal to stupid’ series.. great colleague, one of the 3 lords of rock in my class, the biggest Judas Priest fan alive.. :) In the first picture, he`s wearing the jacket he bought.. he looks so damn cool.. and in the second, well.. :))))))) I don`t know what he`s doing, but lemme tell you he is NOT peeing… hopefully :P.

Oooh.. ahahahahaha :))))))) That`s me. Nice hair, huh ? It was a bet.. I got 10 RON for lookin` like that during Maths class… with all the pink accessories included. :) Dammit !

Pavel.. another rocker.. you already met 2 of them. Ahahaha, that grave is in a park near our highschool.. some soldier with the same name as his is burried there.. :)))))) That picture is modified in Photoshop.. you can see Pavel`s ‘ghost’.. :)))))))

Cotoara at Peninsula.. last rocker from the trio of guys. I`m suppose to be the forth wheel. ;)

And a smiley globe. Not to forget it`s Xmas.. :) Pictures rule.. Second session.. ? As soon as I get home.

New yahoo avatar

Posted on December 19, 2005 by Roxa

Told you I`m fine…

Infinite lamentation

Posted on December 17, 2005 by Roxa

Sorry I`m away that long.. :) It`s just that these final weeks are putting a stop to my residual energy. One more week and there comes the weirdest time of the year.. Christmas and stuff.. I don`t know where to hide this year from the lack of money. I don`t even know what I want for Christmas.. a guitar, an iPod, a motherboard, some more memory.. an audio system. Oh screw me :) I want them all, but all that`s gonna be in my pocket for Christmas is 20 RON. What should I buy with those money ? I don`t even have enough to buy my friends or parents something with `em, not to mention myself.. Then what should I do ? Ask my parents money for my friends and.. the other way around ? THAT.. is lame. I`ll just tell them all I`m broke. :P

And now I`m ruuuuuuunnin`.. like an angel.. to the suuuuun.. My God, this song from Guano Apes completely rules.

Neverminding the song, must say I feel like a bag of daily laments. All I can do is complain. I hate this, I hate that, that guy`s stupid, that bitch sucks, school sucks even more, fuck the system, kill the government, I wish I was all alone, I wish I wasn`t so alone, I wish I had a beer, I wish my head didn`t hurt.. DAMMIT ! This should stop. Somehow, being me probably isn`t easy, but my state ( even my state of mind ) is a lot better than anyone`s, if I look around. Wish I could indulge mediocrity, but I can`t. There`s nothing here to satisfy me completely, so I go into this abyss searching for some hidden absolute, but all I can find is more nothing, or just some complex phantoms, illusions.

It`s winter. I wanted to say something in order to complain again, so I`d better end this post here, `till I won`t totally get on my own nerves. Oh, that picture Andrei Morar gave me is beautiful. It`s what he saw one morning from his window. Fantastic, hm ? Still… winter. :P

Frantic tick tick, tick tick tick tock

Posted on December 9, 2005 by Roxa

Don`t ask why I`m listening to St. Anger album. I only like this song and All Within My Hands. Like someone said, it`s like they`re continuously playin` with mom`s dishes. :)))

Sooo.. yesterday the parents have gathered. Unaviodable thing.. our formmaster screwed both me and Bandean in the worst way possible. Why ? Does she know we`re rockers ? I don`t get it.. :))) I mean.. I know she didn`t have anything to reproach to Pavel ( and Cotoara`s mom didn`t go ), and so we were the two left to play with. Aaanyway, can`t say it`s THAT bad, it`s just.. admirably stupid, that`s all. How can you pretend to be a good formmaster if you`re always against your class ? Not to risk an argue with the Religion teacher ( after we skipped Religion last Tuesday – we had to wait another hour only for Religion.. in which we should do.. what ? wait for what ? Jesus wasn`t coming to look busy. :P ), who made such a fuss about us leaving two hours earlier and skipping his class, she told him to write the truancies. As easy as that… but of course, at the meeting with the parents, she told them the catalogue is full of such things ( I`m ok at that chapter ). Aaaaaand, another stupid thing she did. Ahaha, makes me wanna laugh now, but when I heard it, made me wanna explode. She told my dad about Informatics and that the final exam at that object is obligatory. Good thing dad knows better than that.. :)) That`s what she understood.. I`m sick of her stupidity and the impression she`s so superior, at such a different.. higher IQ rank.. even above smarter teachers. Can`t stand her anymore. I`d wish I`d film her and share it with all of you guys, even if some of you ( old ) readers.. and colleagues already know.

And there are lotsa other stupidity examples I can`t take anymore. This world is fed up.. from the ordinary people who yell at you `cause they, seemingly, can`t sit RIGHT in the bus, to teachers, colleagues, parents, even close friends. Maybe I`m too bad-tempered and irascible, but this week has killed me. A bunch of other things useless to be written here happened. Just hoping I`m gonna live enough to forget.

Luckily there are things that seem to go well, without any trouble along the way. I promise a funny post and some pictures as soon as possible. :)

Bleeding me…

Posted on December 7, 2005 by Roxa

Heh, I`m still kinda stuck on Tool, even if Metallica is shadowing all my thoughts and feelings.. God, this is worse than I ever thought it`ll be, and I`m talkin` `bout life lately. This schedule is going to kill me, but softly, slowly.. My head`s about to explode.. I`m surrounded by so much stupidity daily, I think I`m gonna go insane.. not only at school ( even if the origin is still ingrown there ), but home as well.. I don`t know what happened to mom.. she`s freaking out because of school.. I don`t even wanna picture the atmosphere next year. It`s like the whole fuckin` world has gone insane, what the heck is going on, dammit ?

I wake up every day at 5:30 AM to get to school `till 7 AM ( screw you, 23 – that`s a famous bus line in my town ), then I should pay enough attention and be responsive to every lesson `till 4:20 PM.. then go home and study for next day, do all your homework, at all your objects, even study Religion, if I can… ( right. ). I should`t go out, write, watch a movie.. in other words, can`t freakin` relax `cause mom has this new freaky habit : she comes to tell me I should be in bed, sleeping at 10 PM.. and I`m like what the fuck ? What`s with the new rule ? I have enough trouble sleeping, this is gonna be too much.. I hate sleeping.. or at least at night. :P If I go to bed too early.. I`m tired as a shit the next day.. there`s plenty more energy when you don`t get to sleep that much.

On another hand, school. Goddammit, sometimes I wish to kill `em all. So many tests, so much fuss about nothing.. oh, and a meeting with the parents, tomorrow. Cotoara is fucked. And so am I. I swear I can`t take it anymore.

Ohhhhh, and my formmaster.. piece of rarity in the stupidity museum. Instead of helping us, she`s always against us, never knowing what she should inform us about.. all the things we should know about are being told by Lobi. What became of those people called teachers ? Well anyway.. can`t wait `till after the ‘reunion’.. I`m sooo curious about what she`ll say to my dad now.. they`ve heard enough about me last year, and so did I .. found out sooooo many things about myself I didn`t know.. :))))

Amazingly frustrated about everything.

Chaos released

Posted on December 4, 2005 by Roxa

Oh boy, this is a living hell. We have to solve 54 exercises at Math.. do I need to say I`m way too stupid for `em ? :)))) They`re really hard, thank God there is an Andrei who went to some teacher to solve all of them… Now I`m expecting the scanned images of all my homework.. or test, or whatever it`s supposed to be, `cause we have to write it on different sheets of paper, then to give them to Lobi. Shitty. Everything would be so much easier if mom wasn`t so annoyin`..

I`m waiting to die.. today has been such a chaos ! Fuck everyone who just wants to take advantage.. Fuck `em all.

Just jabbering around…

Posted on November 29, 2005 by Roxa

Yeah, this is one of the useless posts in which I`m lettin` everyone know how my life`s going.. So uninteresting, I know, I`m aware.. but I have to, it`s essential to me, even if I`d better start writing those articles for EgoPHobia.. maybe later.. I need to get really pissed off first, because I planned to write as sarcastic and mean as I can. >:)

Soooo.. my so-called relationship is on timeout for a week now.. Hmpf.. _ADI_`s like a leaf in the wind.. Everyone`s opinion counts, he`s so influenced.. and it really scares me to get involved.. What if his parents won`t agree ? ( His father already has something against me.. I sense it.. ) What if the gang of guys will suddenly decide I`m not good enough for him ? That`ll certainly make him wonder. He`s not strong, he can`t fight, he said it.. and I know that too well.. after all, I know him so well :). Too well for this kind of relationship. I`m scared and I admit it. Don`t know what to think and how to judge this.. He wants to continue, he made it clear, now it`s up to me.. but I`m stuck. On one side I want it too, but there are thousands of things that pull me back. First, there`s no love. Not from me, not from him. We decided it`ll be something that.. grows into us.. but.. how do we know it`ll grow ? :)) Silly.. We`re kids, wondering. I can`t believe I`m after an almost 2 years relationship and I have these questions on my mind. I should know ! If not me, then who ? Adi ? Get serious.. I barely taught him how to kiss :))). And if this turns out not to work.. the triangle ( me, Adi, Csabi ) will disappear.. we`re the gang, we`re best friends, we rock together.. should we spoil it ? Dammit, if my hand was on a trigger, the decesion would have been much easier. Can`t just go with the flow.. I`m supposed to be mature and think twice now. And that`s what I`m doing.. thinking.. thinking.. but time`s tickin`.. tickin`.. What`s with the rush, anyway ? I`m freakin` 18.

Pfff.. complete menu : school started. I`m so amazed to observe the teachers are so far from the thought of retrieving the lessons.. they only want grades.. to have the money and a clear position in front of everyone who dares to put some questions. I don`t get it.. it`s all slipping away from my mind.. I`m loooooosing it !

Heh, I get along well with the rockers in my class, the three princes, like I`ve said. The Cage experience has repeated, with 4 beers this time, but.. I didn`t even feel them. Probably because I was sleeping `till 12 o`clock ? :-” .. Wasn`t me.. :))

Started listening to Disturbed and Slipknot. It`s bad, isn`t it ? :P

Fascination Street

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Yearly Archives: 2005