Fascination Street

The most ridiculous fear in life is the fear of being ridiculous

Infinite lamentation

Sorry I`m away that long.. :) It`s just that these final weeks are putting a stop to my residual energy. One more week and there comes the weirdest time of the year.. Christmas and stuff.. I don`t know where to hide this year from the lack of money. I don`t even know what I want for Christmas.. a guitar, an iPod, a motherboard, some more memory.. an audio system. Oh screw me :) I want them all, but all that`s gonna be in my pocket for Christmas is 20 RON. What should I buy with those money ? I don`t even have enough to buy my friends or parents something with `em, not to mention myself.. Then what should I do ? Ask my parents money for my friends and.. the other way around ? THAT.. is lame. I`ll just tell them all I`m broke. :P
And now I`m ruuuuuuunnin`.. like an angel.. to the suuuuun.. My God, this song from Guano Apes completely rules.
Neverminding the song, must say I feel like a bag of daily laments. All I can do is complain. I hate this, I hate that, that guy`s stupid, that bitch sucks, school sucks even more, fuck the system, kill the government, I wish I was all alone, I wish I wasn`t so alone, I wish I had a beer, I wish my head didn`t hurt.. DAMMIT ! This should stop. Somehow, being me probably isn`t easy, but my state ( even my state of mind ) is a lot better than anyone`s, if I look around. Wish I could indulge mediocrity, but I can`t. There`s nothing here to satisfy me completely, so I go into this abyss searching for some hidden absolute, but all I can find is more nothing, or just some complex phantoms, illusions.
It`s winter. I wanted to say something in order to complain again, so I`d better end this post here, `till I won`t totally get on my own nerves. Oh, that picture Andrei Morar gave me is beautiful. It`s what he saw one morning from his window. Fantastic, hm ? Still… winter. :P
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15 Responses to “Infinite lamentation”

  1. mystique

    I think I know how you feel… God, life sucks sometimes :(.

    my internet connection is so damn stubborn this days… i can’t even see the picture you posted. :((

  2. Rainforest

    Buy beer! Buy beer! And just have fun! It’s important not to be alone. And you are not.

  3. Cougar Of All Trades

    ah, lass, it`s just the winter season, the winter holidays, christmas and all that crap. you`ll get over it.

  4. The Gums

    don’t tell me that’s a view from your window towards elementary school nr 13.. and on the other side there’s balcescu av. ? we might, just might.. know eachother.

  5. boyarul

    Don’t get so involved. It does not help. It’s better to let it be (remember tha’ Beatles?) and just enjoy life & friends.

    I bet those 20RON it’s your monthly income gave by the romanian state, that stupid & cheap alimony. Am I right?

  6. Roxa Trutza

    Chill guys, I`m fine.. and I`ll prove it to y`all. :)
    Boyarul.. you`re right… that`s the allowance. I can shove it up my ass. :)
    Rainforest.. that`s precisely what I had in mind for these money.. they`re not enough for anything else I wanna buy.
    Mystique.. you should know. :)
    Dude ( you know who ).. same for you there, huh ? :)..

  7. Roxa Trutza

    Oh.. Dinah.. it`s not from my window, if you bother to read the post. And I`m from Tg. Mures. :)

  8. Auras

    Christmas would be so much easy, fun, cool without money. I mean just parents (with their big salaries), your Christmas tree, presents under it(from Santa, obviously), some friends around, staying indoors, playing table games, or watching dvds or just sitting around the tree.

    Ah.. Those were the days…

  9. Roxa Trutza

    :) Too good to be true.. or to ever happen.. to me, at least. I tend to screw things up when important events approach. :P

  10. mariuz

    guitar guitar guitar ;)
    Follow your instinct , you will never fail
    Ehh , in 23 it will be Xmas Rock
    at Ariel (20:00 i think)
    I will help with spreading the word (have friends in bands there)

  11. Roxa Trutza

    Well.. if you promise to teach me guitar lessons all summer long, that`s what I`ll choose. :) And I`m serious on that.
    18:00.. for the Rock Xmas event. :P What friends ? I only know Atika`s friend we went to Bucharest to, at the Paradise Lost concert. Looks like he`s in a band. Can`t wait. :D Meet ya there.

  12. The Gums

    i did and still do bother. i’ve noticed in the first place where you’re from and i happen to be born there. the picture seemed like taken from my heighbourhood. i just thought i might know you also because of your last name. but maybe it was just make belief..

  13. Roxa Trutza

    Which is your neighbourhood ? `Cause unfortunately I don`t seem to recall where school number 13 is situated. :)

  14. The Gums

    piata armatei, libertatii, balcescu etc. does that ring any bells? (jingle bells? :P ) well, it’s quite obvious to me now that we don’t know eachother. but i’ll stick around and check up on your blog every now and then as i’ve found quite interesting some of your writings. you hang in there little tomato. :) (pink martini song, one of my favs.)

  15. Roxa Trutza

    Oooooooh.. no, the picture is not taken anywhere near that area.. :) Feel free to visit anytime.

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